It's Sad Surrounded With Negative People

Why Bother Controlling Our Responses?

1. Hurting Ourselves

One of my favorite sayings is “Holding a grudge against someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” The only person we hurt is ourselves. When we react to negativity, we are disturbing our inner space and mentally creating pain within ourselves.

2. It’s Not About You, It’s About Them

I’ve learned that when people initiate negativity, it is a reflection of their inner state expressed externally and you just happen to be in front of that expression. It’s not personal, so why do we take it personally? In short: Because our ego likes problems and conflict. People are often so bored and unhappy with their own lives that they want to take others down with them.

3. Battle of the Ego

When we respond impulsively, it is a natural and honest response. However, is it the smart thing to do? What can be resolved by doing so? The answer: Nothing. It does however feed our ego’s need for conflict.

Have you noticed that when we fight back, it feels really satisfying in our heads? But it doesn’t feel very good in our soul? Our stomach becomes tight, and we start having violent thoughts?

When we do respond irrationally, it turns the conversation from a one-sided negative expression into a battle of two egos. It becomes an unnecessary and unproductive battle for Who is Right?

4. Anger Feeds Anger. Negativity Feeds Negativity. 

Rarely can any good come out of reacting against someone who is in a negative state. It will only trigger anger and an additional reactive response from that person. If we do respond impulsively, we’ll have invested energy in the defending of ourselves and we’ll feel more psychologically compelled to defend ourselves going forward.

Have you noticed that the angrier our thoughts become, the angrier we become? It’s a negative downward spiral.

5. Waste of Energy

Where attention goes, energy flows. What we focus on tends to expand itself. Since we can only focus on one thing at a time, energy spent on negativity is energy that could have been spent on our personal wellbeing.

6. Negativity Spreads

I’ve found that once I allow negativity in one area of my life, it starts to subtly bleed into other areas as well. When we are in a negative state or holding a grudge against someone, we don’t feel very good. We carry that energy with us as we go about our day. When we don’t feel very good, we lose sight of clarity and may react unconsciously to matters in other areas of our lives, unnecessarily.

7. Freedom of Speech

People are as entitled to their opinions as you are. Allow them to express how they feel and let it be. Remember that it’s all relative and a matter of perspective. What we consider positive can be perceived by another as negative. When we react, it becomes me-versus-you, who is right?

Some people may have a less than eloquent way of expressing themselves – it may even be offensive, but they are still entitled to do so. They have the right to express their own opinions and we have the right and will power to choose our responses. We can choose peace or we can choose conflict.

Source: http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/dealing-with-difficult-people/

Tips Berpakaian dan Behijab dengan Fashionable

Fesyen itu luas tetapi bagi wanita berhijab ianya masih perlu ada batas. Walau bagaimanapun, ianya tidak bermasksud wanita berhijab tidak boleh kelihatan “fashionable”. Fesyen itu bukan hanya milik mereka yang bertubuh ideal atau yang berkulit putih mulus. Fesyen itu milik siapa saja yang ingin tampil bergaya tanpa terkecuali. Milik siapa saja yang selalu ingin tampil serasi, seimbang dan sedap dipandang mata. Satu lagi yang paling penting, fesyen itu seharusnya sederhana. So Ladies jangan pernah takut, malu atau terhad untuk berekspresi dan bergaya dalam berpakaian dengan apapun kekurangan anda. Gemuk, bertubuh pendek atau berkulit gelap sama saja, yang penting anda tahu bagaimana cara mengayakannya. Yang penting kesederhanaan.

1.    Hindari Terlalu Banyak Aksesori Di Bahagian Dada

Perhatikan hijab yang bersimpang pada bahagian dada. Hindari terlalu banyak aksesori atau motif yang tertumpu pada bahagian tersebut. Buat kesan yang ‘clean’ di bahagian dada. Hindari aksesori seperti terlalu banyak lengkung-lengkung draperi agar dada tidak menghasilkan kesan ‘penuh’.

2.    Perhatikan Pemilihan Material Hijab

Sebaiknya, pilih hijab dari bahan yang cukup tipis, lembut dan memiliki sifat ‘jatuh’ seperti chiffon, paris, polyspun dan rayon. Jangan memilih hijab berbahan kaku kerana akan membuat bahagian dada anda tampak semakin gemuk.

3.    Hindari Motif Yang Berukuran Besar

Sewaktu memilih motif pada pakaian atau hijab, hindari motif yang berukuran besar. Sekali lagi hal tersebut akan membuat tubuh dan dada anda kelihatan semakin besar. Selain itu, hindari model pakaian yang memiliki detail pada bahagian pinggang dan pinggul. Sebaiknya, pilih tunic dengan kelabuhan setengah paha agar dapat menutupi bahagian belakang anda dengan sempurna.

4.    Jauhi Legging

Jika anda bertubuh besar, jangan pernah merasa mengenakan legging adalah pilihan terbaik, sebaliknya hindari penggunaan legging, jegging atau skinny sebagai seluar utama. Pilihlah yang berbetuk siluet A-line.

5.    Selektif Dalam Memilih Bawahan

Pilih bawahan seperti seluar panjang berpotongan lurus seperti Pallazo atau Bell-bottom. Untuk pemilihan material, disarankan untuk memilih material yang menyerap peluh dan stretch agar anda boleh bebas bergerak.

Cantik itu memang milik siapa sahaja. Jangan pernah merasa diri anda tidak menarik hanya kerana ukuran tubuh yang besar, jika anda sudah tahu cara mengayakannya, anda akan tampak semakin menarik dan fashionable. Di samping itu, cantik dan fashionable tidak akan berarti tanpa disertai dengan hati yang cantik kan. Jadi, semangat ya Ladies, are your ready to be beautiful? Jom visit website www.zatuemerald.com untuk lebih bergaya!